Funniest Celebrity Jokes
Chuck Norris doesn't pay for sex. Sex pays for Chuck Norris
The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
In middle school chuck Norris was assigned an essay about what courage was. He got an A+ by turning in a blank sheet of paper with his name on it.
Chuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
"Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" was originally written as Chuck Norris' theme song.
One time while sparring with Wolverine, Chuck Norris accidentally lost his left testicle. You might be familiar with it to this very day by its scientific term: Jupiter.
Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
Chuck Norris visited the "virgin" islands...... when he left it was renamed to the islands.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
When chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.
There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
Chuck Norris once masturbated in a junk yard.
Nine months later Optimus Prime was born.
Chuck Norris does, in fact, live in a round house.
When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
Chuck Norris has volunteered to remain on earth after the Rapture; he will spend his time fighting the Anti-Christ.