Funniest Dirty Celebrity Jokes

Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by pointing at her and saying "Booyah".
0 14 14 -14
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
0 6 6 -6
The sex with a pie scene in "American Pie" is based on a dare Chuck Norris took when he was younger. However, in Chuck Norris' case, the "pie" was the molten crater of an active volcano.
-1 19 19 -19
Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.
-1 21 21 -21
Most men are okay with their wives fantasizing about Chuck Norris during sex, because they are doing the same thing.
-1 21 21 -21
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
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Chuck Norris' blood type is DOA Fucking Negative.
-1 21 21 -21
The Internet was invented by Chuck Norris so he had a place to put his porn collection.
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When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.
-2 16 16 -16
Chuck Norris' sphincter has fangs.
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Some people piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris pisses his name in concrete.
-3 31 31 -31
If you try video taping Chuck Norris without his permission you will very quickly be filming the inside of your own ass.
-3 11 11 -11
God modeled his beard look after Chuck Norris.
-4 24 24 -24
Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman is alive afterward.
-4 16 16 -16
Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your butt, don’t be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.
-5 17 17 -17
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
-6 20 20 -20
Lindsay Lohan once put a hickey on one of Chuck Norris' hemorrhoids.
-7 39 39 -39
During WWII Chuck Norris was drafted into the Army. He mercilessly roundhouse kicked everyone to death including Ally soldiers. Their resting place is now known as Arlington Cemetery.
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Homeless people are afraid to ask Chuck Norris for change. The last guy who did got a half dollar scissor kicked up his ass...twice.
-12 16 16 -16
Chuck Norris' penis is so large that it has a penis of its own, and that one is still bigger than yours.
-32 40 40 -40
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