Funniest Clean Celebrity Jokes

Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you......Fourty seven times.
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Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.
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Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get hangovers. He just gets pissed.
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When Chris Angle levitated in front of Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris just laughed and flew away.
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In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris uses tabasco sauce instead of visine.
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In a tagteam match, Chuck Norris was teamed with Hulk Hogan against King Kong Bundy and Andre The Giant. He pinned all 3 at the same time.
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In the medical community, death is referred to as "Chuck Norris Disease"
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Chuck Norris is so bad he makes viruses sick. As such, Chuck Norris is also responsible for the eradication of smallpox.
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When chuck Norris was born WWII had ended
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Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
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Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
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Chuck Norris knows everything there is to know - Except for the definition of mercy.
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If Chuck Norris round-house kicks you, you will die. If Chuck Norris' misses you with the round-house kick, the wind behind the kick will tear out your pancreas and you will still die.
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have you ever wondered why stephen hawkins is in a wheelchair it's because he was getting smart with Chuck Norris
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It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.
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Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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Chuck Norris did that to Michael Jackson's face.
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