Funniest Clean Celebrity Jokes

As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
15 19 19 -19
There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
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Proponents of higher-order theories of consciousness argue that consciousness is explained by the relation between two levels of mental states in which a higher-order mental state takes another mental state. If you mention this to Chuck Norris, expect an explosive roundhouse kick to the face for spouting too much fancy-talk.
15 19 19 -19
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
15 17 17 -17
when chuck Norris went to find Bigfoot, Bigfoot copied him self to escape from chuck
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With the rising cost of gasoline, Chuck Norris is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
13 17 17 -17
Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.
13 15 15 -15
Chuck Norris is not Irish. His hair is soaked in the blood of his victims.
13 17 17 -17
If you catch Chuck Norris sleeping he will grant you one wish.... if your wish is dying.
13 19 19 -19
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
13 15 15 -15
Chuck Norris was kicked off the show "Extreme Couponing" the producers couldn't stand watching entire grocery chains file bankruptcy because of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.
13 15 15 -15
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
13 15 15 -15
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this mans blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
13 15 15 -15
Jack Links Beef Jerky wanted to film a series of "Messin' with Chuck Norris" commercials. They later had to settle for Sasquatch because they couldn't find any actors dumb enough to mess with Chuck Norris.
13 15 15 -15
Chuck Norris died yesterday. He's fine today.
13 13 13 -13
Chuck Norris has to use a stunt double when he does crying scenes.
13 15 15 -15
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talking about.
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